Wednesday, October 12, 2005
What the fuck happened?
I don't know what to say. I predicted a very reliable 12-0 score for the Canucks over the lowly, defensive minded Minnesota Wild. The Wild, however, aided by a figure only as evil and diabolical as either Palpatine
could be evil enough to have effected the near reversal of the score, leaving the Canucks agast at the hands of their first regulation defeat, 6-0.
Well, elsewhere in the A-Golden-World-a-verseTM, Montreal defeated Atlanta 2-0, and with the two goals, thus divided the total goal scoring in the Canucks game by two.
In unrelated news, UNICEF bombed the Smurfs.
This act could only be perpetrated by such evil, such as this man
or this man
and as such, whoever did it, needed to bring the ForceTM just out of balance long enough for a humanitarian organization such as UNICEF to bomb the crap out of Smurfs. Just as an editor's sidenote, anyone reading this, while playing the Smurfs drinking game, must now finish all the alcohol, or more commonly referred to as CH3CH2OH around these parts, in your entire home. Go, drink now. Bwahahaha.
Anyhow, Bush/Palpatine/Benedict XVI had to find the misbalance somewhere. As such, said part took Vancouver's remaining 6 goals, and gave them to the Wild. As such, utter perfection for Bert!!
For our next game, the Canucks stay in Minnesota, only to exact revenge on Friday for the evils of the Sith. Though now we won't be fooling ourselves, and the Bert-accu-scoreTM for the game is:
Vancouver 5 Minnesota 3
neolithic pondered at 23:47
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